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The Chairman's Blog 10: Sir Benjamin Dover of Global Mining Endeavours is stranded in France and needs help from Chris Cleverley again

By Tom Winnifrith | Tuesday 6 September 2016


 


Following the example set by Paul Warwick the chairman of worthless penny stock Andalas (ADL) in starting a blog, Sir Benjamin Dover of AIM listed Global Mining Endeavours has decided to follow suit and like Paul promises to be Candid in his approach. Blog number ten....

You can see all the entries in The Chairman's Blog HERE

September 6th

Fellow shareholders in Global Mining Endeavours, I apologise for not commenting on yesterday's developments more promptly. When Miss Skirt switched on the goggle box in our Paris hotel room during our brainstorming management away day weekend there were lots of pictures of darkies fighting with journalists outside Calais.

Always bet on the black man is my advice when it comes to boxing matches and true to form the illegal immigrants from the jungle were giving some reporters from the Daily Mail and other rags a damn good thrashing. I believe in a free press as much as the next man as long as it is the Financial Times. Je suis Snot gobbler McCrum and all that. But the rest of the 4th Estate are beneath contempt so I was cheering on the darkies all the way.

But fearing that this little scuffle might disrupt our journey back to London, Miss Skirt and I took an executive decision to extend our management away weekend and so we were hard at it once again for an additional day. Not only did we labour away all weekend on behalf of shareholders but also on Monday too. You can't knock that sort of dedication can you?

Anyhow it appears that some documentation relating to our acqusition of the L'Ebola acareage in Bongo Bongo land has found its way to that prize shit Winnifrith who has blogged it onto the interweb pointing out the clauses about handing over £600,000 to the natives c/o the usual bank accounts in Geneva as an "arrangement fee."

As my good friend Lord Howard of Quindell said the other day "Britain really must take a stand against bribery and corruption." I can't remember what the good Lord wanted to do about it as at that point he had to take a call from the Serious Fraud Office about urgent matters at Soma Oil. But in this new climate of political correctness gone mad, I rather feared that the documentation would not go down that well with our investors.

Luckily my good friend Chris Cleverley of African Potash was quick to email over his sage advice. Miss Skirt switched on my computer thingy and read out his note:

Ben: Get your lawyers to write to Winnifrith saying that everything he has published is true but since your contracts are only MOUs, you are allowed to do what you want and do not have to admit to non legally binding bribes . And demand huge damages from the bastard for daring to tell the truth and for using your company logo.

PS Get your PR people to brief that as he does not work for the Financial Times he is not a proper journalist anyway.

Gosh it is useful to know someone like my good and trusted friend Chris who has such a clear understanding of the law. Our crack team at Memery Crystal should be back from their Greek windsurfing holidays, organised by their good client Costis, by now and I shall get them onto the case at once.

To be continued...



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