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New WH Ireland caption Contest - pensioner mugging edition

By Tom Winnifrith | Sunday 8 May 2016

Disclosure: I have no positions in any stocks mentioned, and no plans to initiate any positions within the next 72 hours. I wrote this article myself, and it expresses my own opinions. I am not receiving compensation for it (other than from ShareProphets). I have no business relationship with any company whose stock is mentioned in this article.

John Molyneux, the WH Ireland (WHI) stockbroker who destroyed the life savings of Essex pensioner Mr Bagot, left the disgraced broker in a bit of a hurry last year. We now have an exclusive picture from the HR department as they interview for a suitable replacement. can you please supply a suitable caption in this week's contest, in the comments section below - deadline midnight 8 May.

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  1. seated man to pirate “ Yes indeed Mr Silver , you would be employed as a broker to our discretionary clients . This means they give you a lump sum of money and you decide exactly what to invest it in . If that investment be shipping containers full of stolen BMW 7 series and top of the range 4wd desert driving toys for filthy rich Arab boys then so be it “ “if it all goes pear shaped we will just turn a blind eye and you wont have a leg to stand on” .

  2. Hanging is Far Too Good for Them

    You look like you should fit in. This place isn’t called Treasure Ireland for nothing1

  3. Mr Landau so you used to run AIM companies which went down the pan and you are now being investigated by the Old Bill in Oz, perfect …you’re hired when can you start?



    Listen, I said we need someone to pillage our PRIVATE clients, not our PIRATE clients!!


  5. Kayserasera

    I’m sorry Mr Silver we can’t offer you a position on this occasion, we’re looking for much lower standards of honesty and integrity than you have exhibited in your career to date.

  6. Kayserasera

    Yes that’s right Mr Silver, you don’t even have to give them any of their own money back, they give you their lifetime savings, you take a few percent for yourself and then flush the rest down the toilet, simples!

  7. Kayserasera

    Yes the job’s yours Mr Silver, you’ll align perfectly with our firm’s new mission statement, By Hook or by Crook!

  8. So Mr Pirate, I understand that you applying for the job because you lost your ship? The good news is that this means you will have something in common with many of customers who ask where are our yachts?

  9. Sorry Mr Silver, you’re over qualified, We prefer to leave our clients without a leg to stand on.

  10. Steffi the TR1 Queen©

    The unfortunate victim’s last words: “Well Mr Levi, your proven success in impoverishing Mr & Mrs Williams and their son Christopher makes you a stand-out candidate for this post. However, we have decided to appoint someone who doesn’t have to disguise themselves with a false beard and an eye patch every time they leave the house. By the way, I trust that’s a pair of stage pistols and a blunt cutlass you have there…..”


    It’s refreshing to meet a candidate who prefers to work for us rather than cruise around the Caribbean plundering Canadian merchantmen and exploiting vulnerable families. So, was it the second reading of Bill S-220, an Act to amend the Criminal Code (international fraud) that made you choose to leave LeniGas Cuba at this particular time Mr Blackbeard?

  11. Kayserasera

    Now run along please Mr Silver, we’ve got to draw the line somewhere and that beard is just completely unacceptable!

  12. Tell me. Why do they call you Long John?

  13. Well Mr Molyneux you can have your job back. You’ve been doing such a great job managing the BHS Pension fund…

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