UK 10:10 Friday, 18 September 2026
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Disclosure: I have no positions in any stocks mentioned, and no plans to initiate any positions within the next 72 hours. I wrote this article myself, and it expresses my own opinions. I am not receiving compensation for it (other than from ShareProphets). I have no business relationship with any company whose stock is mentioned in this article.
Earlier today I penned a piece on Fastjet (FJET), a company which is a crock of shit. Its PR firm, Citigate Dewe Rogerson, threatened me not about saying that Fastjet is a crock of shit but about what I said about one of its staff. I was threatened with a libel writ from Slaughter & May for inter alia suggesting that an employee was of Greek origin. This Citigate reckons is a slur as clearly it was aimed as an insult. But I live in Greece and love the place said I. But your readers do not know that said Citigate. Whatever... I reckon you do don't you? This podcast sets the record straight on all matters including me making it clear that all employees of Citigate are geniuses, the real reason my question on Fastjet is not being answered ( 3rd time lucky in terms of asking) and why I now contemplate retirement. What a silly and oppressive place the City and Britain has become.
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Comments
wildrides
Well I know you love Greece and that cant fail to come across to anyone who reads your work .
I love Greece too ……….. all those virgins squashing olives between their bronze tanned thighs to squeeze out the olive oil ……..how could one not ( what do you mean “thats not how they do it” are you sure ? )
Kevin Taylor
You’d have thought that the PR firms would have worked out by now that threatening TW was pointless!
Drunken Sailor
The truly daft thing is they could easily have answered the question actually asked. The $20m figure is net cash as defined in normal accounting practice, which in the case of FJET is the same as cash in the bank as they have no debt (unless they have taken a sneaky overdraft and not told anyone). And refused to confirm or deny your assumption that net payables and receivables remain little changed from the interims – they did spunk a lot of cash in the last half and some of that could have gone to redress that balance, but that would be additional info and not clarification.
Nicotine Nelly
What totally pompous prats Citigate have made themselves out to be.
Don’t retire yet Tom, we need you here to relieve to gloom of a boring day.
PS I had a brief spell working in an olive factory on Paxos – happy days on the Retsina, Metaxa and Ouzo. There were/are no PR bimbos on that island, thank God.
Duck and Dive
As your own commenters were quick to point out, the lady in question had said nothing to justify your pejorative description of her as “an attractive but empty-headed young woman, esp. one perceived as a willing sex object” (New Oxford American Dictionary) and it is no bad thing that you are reminded that the principles of free speech don’t extend to breaking the laws of libel.
Meanwhile, whatever you believe the definition of “net cash” or “available cash” to be, its intended meaning in both the RNS and the ED note is clearly that $20m in cash is available to cover outgoings and losses for the foreseeable future. Had there been a prior call on any of that cash by any creditor then it could not have been categorised as available or net. There is also additional cash of up to $15m from the sale of an Airbus 319 optionally available, if not immediately…unless Fastjet have already sold it (but that eventuality would have required an RNS).
The current scenario is not dissimilar to the 2014 FY when, from memory, Fastjet reported net cash of under $2m and current (net) trade payables of some $16m. And I’m sure those accounts were given an unqualified sign-off by the auditors, KPMG.
Mr Keyboard Warrior
Fuck Me… The usual excuse is that you regularly fuck off to Greece to avoid getting your head kicked in by Chris Boil or being served by Joe Le Taxi. Now they are saying no-one knows that. Amaze-Balls.
Anyway…. what’s this Woman doing not answering reasonable questions then getting Some-Bloke Else to be upset on her behalf when you call her for not answering reasonable questions?
You asked, apparently politely, three times, she responded with bollocks three times then you called her for spouting bollocks.
I would not wish to come across as being sexist but “heat/kitchen”. Perhaps she should fuck off back to it and cook eggs for her new Boy Freud.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zJsYgqQ0zEk
Next time just call her an obfuscating bastard who is very good at her job. Then she can put that one on her CV.
Drunken Sailor
D & D do not quote libel laws to TW – he has been there and got many a T shirt to prove it. Referring to someone as a Bimbo is not libel.
What was the shareprice in 2014 and how much lower is it now?
The fact remains that the company is in a dire financial condition. Net current assets are likely to be closer to Tom’s estimate that they are to $20m. The aircraft is not a current asset, but the point of such tangible assets it they could be sold, however fire sales of assets rarely achieve their balance sheet value.
Tom is wrong to say the accounts will be qualified, they most probably won’t be – that happens when the auditor cannot reconcile the books. However the accounts will be prepared on a going concern basis, which will include the statement that should they not be a going concern then different figures would apply (ie you won’t be able to sell the assets for their book value). The directors will make some sort of statement to justify the going concern basis. The auditor with emphasise the matter of going concern highlighting that there is material uncertainty over whether the company can remain as going concern, unless a significant placing has been done prior to sign off. Emphasis of matter is not the same as qualification. However the track record of companies that have an emphasis of matter over the going concern statement and them remaining a going concern 12 months later is really not very good. Companies do everything possible to avoid having the matter emphasised in their annual report. Ie they try to raise money before sign off of the accounts – normally a close period is 2 months before accounts are expected to be out, but can be longer.
What is wrong is that PR firms and Brokers are trying to pretend a placing is not inevitable so they can do a placing, possibly on some ramp about Easter passenger numbers. It is all rather cynical and sordid, it will catch a load of PIs out as they become cannon fodder, yet again, for the bucket shops. If you really believe FJET has a future then you would be better off putting your efforts into getting your directors, who run the company on your behalf, to walk and let Stelios take over. Stelios does not have a magic wand and he will probably have to dilute you to buggery, yet again, but he is the best chance you have, other than just cutting your losses right now, which IMHO would be the sensible thing to do.
andrew
I would just like to point out that the plural of ‘genius’ is genii.
Otherwise you are applying the same method of applying a plural as you would to ‘penis’.
Millfield
I find it interesting that Citigate may have put in writing an opinion which considers accusing a person of being Greek to be a slur.
Surely this must constitute an offence against our Greek born citizens under at least one of our multitude of racial discrimination laws.
Duck and Dive
@DS – the lesson that Tom might have learned is that PR people aren’t worth him risking his liberty/liquidity for. They certainly aren’t the real crooks. They are mostly just parasites, existing some way down the food chain, who rarely confront their clients to force a change of behaviour in the interest of good PR. That’s partly because they have no power. CEOs listen to nomads and lawyers but not a lot to PR practitioners. Imho, Tom shouldn’t be wasting his energy on them.
As for Fastjet’s 2015 accounts, I assume that the auditors will focus on the 31 Dec year end when, allegedly, “net” cash was over $27m (plus a $15m tangible asset) and would not have raised any “going concern” flags.
Drunken Sailor
D&D
Net cash $27m, Net current assets $12m of which $8m spunked in the first 2 months of the year. They could put the plane as an available for sale asset to make it current, but would have to be at a price that someone would pay, not at book value. Having to flog off the family silver in a fire sale is not a great sign either and would probably still be accompanied by an emphasis of matter regarding going concern, unless they actually had an offer for the plane. Even then they could easily be bust within 12 months as the plane sale might only be another 3 months of cash burn the way they went though it in the first 2 months.
Have you ever called someone a bastard? Were you sure they were born out of wedlock? You could have libelled or slandered them oh dear! Or perhaps it is a common insult, which may not be considered particularly pleasant in polite society, but never the less does no real harm regardless of whether used in accordance with its dictionary definition. Bimbo is a commonly used insult that probably does not even rank a harshly as bastard. However having read her twitter feed empty-headed young woman does seem about right. There are also far less flattering photos of her available on the internet. Tom picked a nice one and one which she herself promotes.
The PR people are completely unregulated and are paid to lie and obfuscate for the company (which is exactly what they have done here), They are responsible for feeding most of the lies and rumours to BBMs so they can be cannon fodder for the next placing. They also account for a significant proportion of the fixed costs of running a PLC. Of course TW should expose them in the same way as others.
Marvin
Auditors will look at current position when considering going concern I would have thought.
Duck and Dive
@DS – in any year, Fastjet’s burn rate will be higher in Jan/Feb than at any other time of the year as revenues start to pick up from March onwards. Costs are also being cut so it isn’t realistic to project the Jan/Feb burn rate forward.
I save all my abuse for those who most deserve it — but I am not a publisher: if I were, I would think twice before abusing anyone.